A friend told us we should share more about our wedding. But personally I just wasn’t ready to put it out there to those who weren’t part of it. The memories were still raw. I was still catching the moments and holding them close to my heart. The ones that were there to experience it could only understand, putting into words about our wedding, well words just never seemed to do it right.
Last Friday we celebrated our second year anniversary. And I could feel my grasp slowly loosening, getting ready to share. To have our couples understand where we come from and our approach to weddings, and connecting with those that feel the same way. Our hands are ready to reach out and hold onto others that want to be part of it.
We had gotten engaged end of June and had only told our family and closest friends. We didn’t even share the news on social media until about two months later. Clearly we have issues about sharing. But really we were just enjoying the time to be engaged. We didn’t want to answer questions if we had a date set and if we knew where and, the million dollar question we got asked, who our photographer would be. We didn’t do any planning for the first month of getting engaged and it was nice. We had been together for almost twelve years, it was a time many people close to us had been waiting for, ourselves included, and we simply wanted to be in that moment.
Surprisingly enough, even after being part of so many weddings as a photographer and before then, a guest, I personally wasn’t the type of girl who had her wedding all planned out. Together Joe and I talked about what we wanted. And the first major thing was putting together our vision. It was pretty simple actually: we wanted to be surrounded by nature.
We wanted our friends and family to come together as a community, to take the time out and just enjoy being together — for it not to be just one day and done, but to create an experience.
We always knew we’d have have a fall or winter wedding and so we decided on November. As in like three months away from when we were planning.
Finding a place that would cater to our idea wasn’t the easiest. Actually it was really difficult. Really we were focused on two things: to be in nature, obviously, and to have accommodations for us and our guests all together in one area. There was one place that ugh, break my heart, checked off so much for us but just couldn’t work out. Ironically enough it was a city that we had fallen in love with. Ben Lomond. A small little mountain town next to Santa Cruz with a downtown area including a local grocer and small fire station and two lane roads. You could just imagine everyone calling each other by name and asking how their aunt was doing because everyone knew everyone.
It felt like the experience we wanted to create for our family and friends. It felt like home. It felt right.
We found a place in that town. When we walked the grounds it felt right. When we saw the cabins we knew it’d be perfect for our family and friends to gather. When we found ourselves in one spot surrounded by trees, we knew that was the very spot we wanted to get married at.
Obviously our photographer was top priority and even before we booked our venue we wrote out a love letter to her, pouring our hearts about how much we admire her work and knew she had to be at our wedding. One hiccup? She would be out of the country in November. But the thing about knowing what you want and going after it, is knowing you have to have it. So we changed our date and worked around her schedule.
December 2, 2014. Did we mention it was on a Tuesday? Yeah, why not. We liked the date and that’s what we wanted.
We fully believe in planning a wedding the way you want it. And when you plan one that is “so you”, your family and true friends will see that and understand. And support you.
Will everyone? No. But we like to focus on the family that were there, the grade school friend who drove all the way from Oregon to be there for you, the friend who even though their boss decided last minute not to give them the next day off still stayed late and drove the six plus hours back home to make it back to work.
Our family fully supported us. Which was number one. We sat down my parents and shared our ideas and considering my sisters both had very traditional weddings I could not have appreciated more when they smiled and nodded and loved our plans, our vision. Later when my mom and I were talking and she got giddy just thinking about everything, it made me happy.
Let go of what you think “should be” done or what “everyone else does”. DO YOU.
One more post coming at you tomorrow including all the other important decisions we made.
All freaking bad to the bone photos by our bad to the bone photographer Andria Lindquist.